The milkman
We lost another WWII veteran today. My uncle, John Stanley, who was 98, served in the Navy on the U.S.S. Texas as a gunner’s mate. Like most of the men in that job, he lost much of his hearing while doing it. On my last visit out to Denver, where he and my aunt lived, he showed me his medals, and an amazing picture of a kamikaze plane just about to crash into the ship behind his.
You know all those old jokes about women falling in love with the milk man? Well, that actually happened to my Aunt Winnie. Uncle Johnny drove a milk truck and he delivered the milk to her house at 5:30 every morning. He fell for when he was 20 and she was 14. The story goes that, because of his affection for her, he left her a small bottle of chocolate milk every day as a treat. Unfortunately, her brother John woke up first, drank the chocolate milk, and never mentioned it to anyone. Uncle Johnny had to wait for two years to date Aunt Winnie, because she wasn’t allowed to date until she turned 16. They were married when she turned 21, and have been married for 71 years! They have seven children.
Uncle Johnny was a numbers man. After the war he got a job selling Prudential insurance, the perfect job for him. He had an incredible memory, and loved trivia. Every time we saw him, he would say something like, “Do you know how many bricks it took to build the (fill in the building or structure)?” Of course we’d have no idea, but he’d tell us exactly how many bricks. Or how many men it took to build it. Or how many man-hours. The numbers were always in the millions, but he’d remember them down to the last digit. He was an affectionate guy, and would always hold my hand when he talked to me. He loved to sing, and made up songs about working the milk route.
For most of his life he was strong and healthy, but he had occasional, bizarre health issues that would have set others way back. Not him. He was blind for an entire year when he was a senior in high school, until his dentist figured out that a wisdom tooth was pushing on a nerve. Once they removed it, he could see again. In his mid-80s his vision was failing again, and he was diagnosed with a benign brain tumor which needed to be removed. He had to shop around to find a doctor who was willing to anesthetize him at his age. We were all very nervous about the surgery, which was quite serious, but he was undaunted. Of course he came out of it with flying colors.
The last time I saw my aunt and uncle in Raleigh was a few years ago, when they flew in to visit my mom. I have an image of them in my mind that I’ll hold on to forever. The two of them were in a guest room in the residence where my mom lives. They were sitting on a bench at the bottom of the bed, side by side, like birds on a telephone wire. The bench was pulled up close to the TV so they could see and hear it, and they were holding hands, as always.
Uncle Johnny was a lifelong Catholic, and up until two years ago when he had a stroke, he was still acting as a Eucharistic Minster at his church, giving out communion at mass. He was also still driving, and attending weekly Rotary meetings. He contributed to his country, his family, his church, and his community in ways too numerous to mention. They just don’t make ‘em like that anymore.
So long, milkman.
This photo was taken in 1992, at my folks’ 50th wedding anniversary mass. My mom and dad, Bill and Angie, are on the left. Uncle Johnny and Aunt Winnie, my mom’s sister, are on the right.
June 23rd, 2008 at 9:45 am
Elaine,
What a beautiful tribute. I wish I’d had a chance to meet your uncle. He sounds like an amazing man whose passing deeply felt by many people. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Sue
June 23rd, 2008 at 11:39 pm
Elaine,
I don’t even drin milk, but I think I could have easily fallen in love with someone as charming as your uncle!
Wonderful tribute!
Sandra.
June 26th, 2008 at 7:38 am
Hi, Elaine,
That was such a sweet and funny story about how Uncle Johnny met Aunt
Winnie, leaving a bottle of chocolate milk for her every day, which her
brother drank. I’m not sure “falling in love with” the milkman was exactly
the way the stories used to go, but it sure was the case for Aunt Winnie.
And I love that story! What a sweet sweet love story. Holding hands and
“sitting like 2 birds on a telephone wire” watching TV up close together
when they visited your mother last. I visualized that in my mind as I read
your article. How sad for Aunt Winnie to lose her partner in life after 71
years of marriage. All those years together. A whole life time. I can’t even
begin to imagine how sad she must be. That was a wonderful article that you
wrote. It sure left tears in my eyes and now my throat is all choked up.
I have pictures of them in my head, too. Happy, smiling, a handsome and
elegant couple like your parents and all the “original” Courtney couples.
What great families to look up to, each of the Courtney couples. Each with
their own unique story, but all so in love with each other, respectful to
each other, caring and kind, thoughtful in all they do for each other. Just
the way that psalm “Love is Kind.” goes that so many have read at their
wedding ceremonies. Each Courtney couple lives and lived that verse. God was
so good to give each of them (and us, too, Elaine) a spouse to treasure for
life. The men calling their wives their “beautiful brides” after all those
years of marriage and really meaning every word they lovingly say. How
awesome is that! If only every couple could really live that way wouldn’t we
have a much happier world.
The Courtney reunion is coming up and we will miss the ones who have gone on
to heaven but we’ll always remember them for all the wonderful qualities
they passed on to all who knew them. Great inspirations, all the Courtney
“originals” and their spouses. It makes you treasure each of our own little
families and our bigger extended families all that much more when God calls
one home and you look back and remember his or her life’s story. Which makes
me remember to thank you once again for the treasure you gave the family and
all who get the chance to read the book you wrote about your parents, “All
On Account of You.” Reading how they met and courted all those years ago is
a wonderful and unique gift. Too bad everyone doesn’t have an author in
their family to write the story about their parents. Your article on Uncle
Johnny is another wonderful memory to pass on to the family though.
Something to smile about at such a sad time. Thank you for that, too,
Elaine.
June 27th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Elaine,
What a wonderful tribute to your Uncle Johnny! I love to hear about your family and the story about the chocolate milk is so funny. There is so much love in your family, and it is a real inspiration to read about.
Sara
June 30th, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Elaine,
Thanks for sharing the memories! As I read the story, it brought back so many memories of Uncle Johnny. I do remember all his lines about………….”Do you know how many men it took to build…..” That is so funny that you mentioned it. I too remember that he always held my hand when he wanted to tell me a story.
He was so fun to be around and talk to over the past many years. I remember when we took a family vacation to Denver twice. He always wanted to show us everything he could in the short time we were there. I remember spending the week at Avalon Beach for a Courtney reunion. What great times!
Yes, Uncle Johnny will always have a special place in my heart.
Thanks for sharing!
Sharon